Struggling to fix 2013 workflows

I build a new farm.  I installed 2013 worfklows.  I cannot get them to run.  I can't find a fix.  I'm exhausted from trying with SharePoint.  :(

I need a consitent way to make sharepoint work.  It's terrible.

Anyone have a current checklist of things to do to reverse engineer all the problems?  I can only go so far as follow the flipping instructions.  Ugg.